How i can make my own push notification server for my android & ios application? m not wanna to use GCM.
GCM and APN are the client side part of the infrastructure. You should still set up your own messaging server. That event-based server will then push messages to the clients via the proprietary infrastructure. I think applications should be respectful of their enironment, and using the push facilities of the platform is indeed a good thing for your users. Also, it should be even easier for you to implement, thanks to the standard setup and the working documentation.
Otherwise, just pick your favourite message queue middleware (Active, Zero, you name it) and integrate it directly with the native client for the supported platforms, without using GCM (or Apple push). But be warned that this will make your application less efficient, and you may face higher development costs to set up the background notification service.