Virual instruments usually have many device-specific analog parameters, which affect output sound. For example:
Can I manage them without writing my own vst host?
For example, I don't need to write a vst host to send note to it, if existing one can accept external sequencer. - I can send MIDI messages to it using NAudio, C# and virtual MIDI cable.
What feature (protocol?) corresponds to "acceptance of external sequencer", if I want not to send notes, but alter parameters mentioned above?
It's a bit hard to understand, but it sounds like MIDI CC messages are what you are looking for:
http://nickfever.com/music/midi-cc-list
Note that not all VST plugins respect the MIDI GM correctly (ie, the "MIDI CC purpose" column in that document).