Solutions for INSERT OR UPDATE on SQL Server

Question

Assume a table structure of MyTable(KEY, datafield1, datafield2...).

Often I want to either update an existing record, or insert a new record if it doesn't exist.

Essentially:

IF (key exists)
  run update command
ELSE
  run insert command

What's the best performing way to write this?

Answer 1

don't forget about transactions. Performance is good, but simple (IF EXISTS..) approach is very dangerous.
When multiple threads will try to perform Insert-or-update you can easily get primary key violation.

Solutions provided by @Beau Crawford & @Esteban show general idea but error-prone.

To avoid deadlocks and PK violations you can use something like this:

begin tran
if exists (select * from table with (updlock,serializable) where key = @key)
begin
   update table set ...
   where key = @key
end
else
begin
   insert into table (key, ...)
   values (@key, ...)
end
commit tran

or

begin tran
   update table with (serializable) set ...
   where key = @key

   if @@rowcount = 0
   begin
      insert into table (key, ...) values (@key,..)
   end
commit tran